To start off..

Being a mom of two is stressful enough. Lets subtract one paycheck and both vehicles, add working on my inner-mommy problems, and preparing to move my crazy sitcom worthy family across the country, and you have my topsy turvey, never-slow-down, make the best of it life. Care to join me on my journey?

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Tomato Bisque

So, on cold yucky winter days, (the ones where im not stuck in the restaurant all day) i happen to love love love a nice hot soup! I’ve actually got a few of my favorite soup recipes sitting on the back burner, I’m still thinking about sharing with you all πŸ™‚ maybe if I get some followers of comments I’ll actually post more lol I might even make a whole soup collection! πŸ™‚

So, as The Great Rachael Ray taught me, there’s soup, and there’should chowder, then there’s choup (which is her word of course, meaning the wonderful hybrid that happens when a chowder and a soup have a baby) and i do love a good choup.

However when the kids are begging for grilled cheese, in my head the best match is not chowder nor choup, but a creamy tomato bisque (which is probably a good middle between soup and choup….I think lol) its so good!

The best I’ve ever had happened to be at a little cafe in town that closes down last year. However one of my very close friends worked the kitchen at said cafe and gave me the secret to their fabulous bisque was nothing but pizza sauce and heavy cream topped with a little cheese.

Amazed at the thought that this wonderful dish I’d loved for years was soo very simple I thought I would take it upon myself to come up with my own recipe with my very own twist πŸ™‚ I’ve made this several times now and my 5 year old and my very picky one year old loves it!! Its a big recipe, makes enough for a very hungry family of 4 or 5 to have at least two bowls each! But I love making big batches of this because I love having some extra to heat up and eat the next day and through the week πŸ™‚ but if you don’t want as much just cut it in half.

2 family size cans Campbell’s tomato soup
1 family cambells tomato soup can full of chicken stock and 1 full of water
2 cans tomato sauce
2 tsp oregano
2 tsp basil
1 1/2 tbsp black pepper
2 tbs minced garlic
1/3 cup shredded Colby jack cheese
1 small carton of heavy cream

Combine all ingredients except cheese and cream into a large pot and heat through on medium high heat.

Turn down heat and add heavy cream, heat through, and softly simmer about 10 minutes. Stir constantly so it doesnt burn the cream. (This is usually when I throw the grilled cheese on the heat. Lots of butter!!)

Stir in and melt cheese, continue to stir occationally for another 5-7 minutes.

It’s the best, truly πŸ™‚ and as always, Shorty and Hammy approved!!

Pesto Pocket Sammies

Okay, so you know how theres just that one food that brings your belly back home to your moms kitchen?

I mean, ive got a few of those lol but most come from my Dads kitchen (where my love of cooking began to simmer)…

However, there is this creative and superbly delicious sandwich that my mother used to make me for dinner when I was a kid. She has no idea where the recipe came from and I’ve been looking for a copy of it online for years, but I’ve never been able to yet. So I came up with my own version and I thought I would share it for others to enjoy as much as I did as a child, as much as my friends have enjoyed it whenever I made it over the years, and as much as my 5year old and 1year old enjoy them now πŸ™‚
Ingredients:
Pocket Thins bread (comes four in a pack)
Spread butter (this is part of my extra delish but not so much as healthy version…so its optional of course)
Priano Basil Pesto sauce
Thinly sliced deli ham
Thinly sliced deli turkey
Thinly sliced deli chicken (for all of these I usually get the small packets of Budding deli meats. 1 package of each will make one sandwich)
Swiss cheese singles
Tin foil
And an oven preheated to 325

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Instructions:

Carefully bend the pita pocket along its perferated middle to split it in half then carefully open each pocket to make sure the sides aren’t stuck together. Be really careful because the pockets can rip really easy when theyre fresh.

Spread the insides of both halves with butter first if you like and then generously with pesto, then set aside. I say generously, because it is seriously the best spread ive ever had. Seriously i used to put it on everything. Lol

Layer pieces of deli meat together to sort of make it look like a vin diagram. I like to put down 5 or 6 pieces of meat then a slice of cheese and repeat until you’ve finished all three packs of meat. I like to add a bit more pesto in the middle of the meat and cheese stack, just because, Its healthy and its sooo delish I can’t get enough of the stuff!!

Then carefully pick up your stack of cheeses and meats and slide one side of the stack into one half of the pita pocket, (don’t be afraid to “stuff it in” it makes for a nice beefed up sandwich when you do that.) Then place the other pita half over the remaining half of the meat stack and place it on a foil square. Tightly wrap the foil around the sandwich to keep it together, and place then in the oven for approximately 20 minutes or until the cheeses are melted through. Run a pizza cutter down the middle (or I just use my chefs knife) and enjoy!!

When I was a kid one of these bad boys was waaay more than enough to fill me up but if you want to serve a side with it, some chips would go great lol obviously, its a sandwich. Or if your like me and live with healthy guy, a vegie side keeps them pretty happy πŸ™‚

I really hope you enjoy this recipe as much as I do. And its also a great one to make with the kids! My shorty loves cooking with me πŸ™‚

And I apologize for the lack of pictures, I’ll add some in here next time I make them. This recipe has made my mouth water so much I would get up and make them right now if it weren’t 1:30 in the morning lol best think I should go to bed now πŸ™‚

The Back Story…

Okay, well there is a whole lot of back story here. Not to excited about sharing all my situations and bad choices, but itll all make sense.

It all started when…

Actually no not all of it, but enough of it lol

Enough of it started when…

About 4 years ago, my oldest son’s father and I were living together. Not dating, or…anything friskier lol, just platonically living together. We liked the fact that we could both be there for Shorty all the time, instead of living seperately and having a visitation schedule. I realize it may sound crazy. And it definately had its ups and downs, but K and I got along well enough to make everything copesetic. I was working, going to school, and doin everything I could to make more for my Shorty and his happiness.
Then I met W. I dont remember much about the fall, but I know I fell hard. He was amazing, and great with Shorty, and at the time, he was exactly what I needed. Before I knew it we were signing the lease on our first house, and I couldnt be happier. One week after we moved in, we celebrated my birthday out with friends and had a wonderful time, but I like felt something was off. The next morning while making breakfast in the kitchen at work, I pulled out a nice hot tray of delicious bacon (one of my very favorite things in the world) and as the (usually) delicious aroma wafted up my nose, my stomach instantly turned and I threw up. An hour later, I was holding a positive pregnancy test in my hands, freaking the heck out!
After work, I grabbed another box of tests (as I had only gotten the one earlier) and came home, (thankfully before W got there) ready to take the rest. All three positive. I went and sat on the couch, my head spinning, trying to process. Then W came home and asked me what was wrong. I remember looking up at him and feeling the tears instantly welling up in my eyes again, “im pregnant”
He dropped down next to me, wrapped his arms around me and said “we’ll figure this out baby, its going to be okay”
A few days later, after the inital shock, it seemed we had both settled into the happiness of our happy little family. He did all the cute things, like massages, and bring home my cravings without me asking, among other things. And of course I was a crazy hormonal pregnant woman making life difficult, but we made it through that ever lasting 9 months and came home from the hospital with our wonderful chunky little Hammy.
And then, home life got a whole lot more stressful, as it does with a newborn around. But after about 4 months, we broke.
Thus begun the worst and craziest year and a half of my life.
On August 7th, W told me that he hadnt been in love with me since before I got pregnant, that he had been trying to figure out how to tell me when I had come home with the news. He said it wasnt worth working out, the feelings just werent there. So after a lot of crying and fighting and pleading, I packed up clothes for the boys and I and left.
We stayed with a friend down the road for a while, but then after a couple of months, and a whole lot of stress with their personal home life, I decided it would be better for everyone if the boys and I went somewhere else.
And thats when K offered to take in both the boys and myself, and I greatfully accepted.
Shortly after that K simultaniously lost his job and his truck, taking us down to one paycheck and one vehicle. So I started working 15 hour days 6 days a week to make ends meet.
Im a waitress, by the way.

Oh and on my way to work one day i wrecked my vehicle, leaving us with zero.

Needless to say, ends were not being met, but cutting out extras, and me continuing to bust my butt, and some occational help from an angel here and there, we were doing okay.

And I was healing. I hadnt let go of W, but I was realizing that I was going to be just fine without him.
Then, about a week before christmas, he said those three words I thought I had needed for so long.
“I miss you”
He sent my head spinning. But the following speech made me remember what it felt like to be happy with him. So I gave it a spin. We had a great christmas with the kids and a quiet new years eve at what used to be our house and it was nice for a while, but the heartbreak memories found me in every corner of that house and I freaked out (naturally lol)
Its now January again. Hes spent a year trying to get me back. Not like avidly trying, because I kept catching him trying to talk to other girls, detering me back every time. Im not really sure how I feel…or what to do about it…
AND
Lastly but not leastly (lol)
In July of this past year, K and W and I decided we wanted to get away from home, and give the kids a brighter future. So I did some research, and we decided to go scout out Colorado. Before returning home we had all unanimously agreed to move the family there.
Its now 6 months later, the departure date growing steadily closer and closer. Im running out of time, money, and most of the will I have to keep going. W hasnt told his parents, K still doesnt have a job, I still dont have a vehicle,  and it feels like everything is crumbling. But im determined to make this change for my kids. No matter what it takes.